Losing your cool lately? Anger and anxiety are related. Addressing anxiety can help calm your anger.

How to deal with Anxiety How do you deal with anxiety? Anxiety is normal. Everyone has anxiety from time to time. But it’s uncomfortable and no one likes it. At Thrive Counseling, we see anxiety every day and work with our clients to reduce and manage it. Anxiety counseling is very effective; you don’t have to suffer with it.             Normally counseling for anxiety starts with exploring the symptoms and causes of anxiety, and then moves into dealing with anxiety using coping tools, specific strategies and also understanding each person’s triggers for anxious thoughts and feelings. Physical Symptoms of Anxiety             Everyone has felt anxiety to some degree. We feel it in our minds and bodies with our nervous system responds to a trigger. Anxiety manifests in the body in several ways. Here are the most common physical symptoms of anxiety: Pounding heart Sweating Headaches Shaking or trembling Dizziness Shortness of breath Upset stomach Low appetite Muscle tension or twitches Shortness of breath Insomnia (difficulty sleeping) Anxiety can look different in different individuals, however. Here’s some less common physical symptoms of anxiety: Ringing in the ears Brain fog or feeling ‘spacey’ Difficulty concentrating Numbness in hands or feet Stomach cramps Frequent urination or diarrhea For most people, anxiety counseling reduces or eliminates all of their physical symptoms. For some people, adding anti-anxiety medication to counseling will be the best treatment option.   Causes of Anxiety             In anxiety counseling, one of the first things we do is pinpoint the causes of anxiety. This can vary from person to person, but there are some commonalities. Causes are also sometimes called triggers. Identifying your own triggers for anxiety can put you back in control of your feelings, and can help you know when to use coping tools.             We can break the causes of anxiety into two categories: internal and external. Internal causes are related to what’s happening inside your body. External causes of anxiety are those that come from the external world. Internal causes of anxiety include: Poor sleep habits or insomnia Poor eating habits (eating too much or not enough, or not eating regular balanced meals) Not getting enough movement or exercise Genetics (anxiety can run in families) Medical condition that causes anxiety (such as a thyroid condition) External causes of anxiety include: Stress at work or school Witnessing a traumatic event Being threatened by someone Instability in your living situation Financial stress Problems in relationships Use of drugs or alcohol             Usually, there is not just one cause of someone’s anxiety; there are many causes, and many layers and nuances to anxiety and our response to it. Extreme Anxiety             Do you feel like your level of anxiety is just too much? Do you feel panicky and on edge most of the time? Do you feel a chronic, everyday low-level sense of anxiety or dread? If this is the case, it’s time to talk to a counselor and get evaluated for an anxiety disorder.             Everyone feels anxiety from time to time, but when anxiety gets in the way of living your life, you may have an anxiety disorder . We treat anxiety disorders all the time at Thrive Counseling; it’s one of the most common issues clients come to us with.             The good news is that an anxiety disorder, or extreme anxiety, is very treatable. Usually within 10-12 sessions with a counselor, anxiety is under control and clients feel like themselves again. If you’d like to talk to a counselor about extreme anxiety, contact us and we will get you right in for an appointment. How to Deal with Anxiety             There are many effective strategies to deal with anxiety when it pops up in your life. Here are a few coping tools that counselors teach their clients in anxiety therapy. Mindfulness skills for anxiety Mindfulness skills teach you how to slow down, be in the moment, slow your thoughts, and calm your body. Ultimately, you learn how to respond to what’s happening around you and inside you, rather than simply reacting to it. You can learn mindfulness skills on your own through a book or e-course, or work with a counselor one-on-one. Analyzing your thoughts This is a common technique in Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT) to deal with anxiety. The basic idea is you learn to observe your own thoughts and the common patterns and narratives you use. Sometimes our thoughts are calm and rational. Sometimes, if we really look at them, our thoughts are overreacting or not serving us very well. If you’re anxious, take some time to write down your thoughts. Are they true? Do they sounds calm and rational? If not, is there another way of looking at this situation that’s more in line with reality? What would your best friend say to you in this situation? Try to reframe your thoughts in a calmer way. Regulate your body             A very simple way to deal with anxiety is to block the causes of anxiety. The tope three things you can control that will regulate your body and stop anxiety is to have good sleep, eat a balanced diet, and move your body every day.             When we sleep well, eat well, and get some exercise our whole nervous system tends to calm down. We feel much less anxious and are able to deal better with the problems we encounter during the day.        

Every time I start this article, I edit it less than a day later. That’s how fast COVID-19 (or coronavirus) is evolving. When I first started, Colorado had no cases. Now there are 77. Who knows how many there will be by the time you read this. The point is, it’s a big deal, and it’s causing a lot of people a lot of anxiety. More Coloradans than ever are reporting poor mental health, and if you’re living with anxiety, obsessive-compulsive disorder, depression, or chronic illness, your natural feelings of worry may be even more heightened. So, how does the city of Denver convince itself to get out of bed every day in the face of a national emergency? Let’s talk about self-care Set realistic expectations and establish boundaries.  Be honest with yourself. If you’re over 60, chronically ill, or immune-suppressed, this may mean staying home and limiting non-essential travel. It’s hard news to take, so be gentle. But once you know where your limitations lie, it’s time to set boundaries and inform family and friends of your decision. Meditate What’s a good way to meditate if you’ve never done it before? First, sit or lie down comfortably. The couch or bed is good, or a very comfy office chair. Next, you close your eyes. Breathe naturally. For me, I like to count my breaths as I breathe in and out. Don’t control it, just notice it. Observe your body’s movements, how your shoulders, chest, and stomach all rise and fall. Continue this for two to three minutes, and then try it for longer periods. If you notice your mind wandering, focus on your breathing again.  Line up a support system This is useful in many ways. Not only does it help with loneliness in the face of social distancing, setting up regular contact with friends and family helps you stay up to date on health statuses. You may also want to ask them for help later. Make lists This is a common strategy to combat anxiety, but it’s extremely useful here as well. What in particular are you stressed about? Is it a list of items you need to track down to stock up for quarantine? Is it a list of things you need to take with you if you need to travel to a friend or family member? Is it the same anxiety you wake up with every day, amplified by one billion? Write it down and walk away from it for a bit. You may find that putting it on paper (or in your phone) stops it from rattling around quite so loudly inside your head. Recognize coronavirus (COVID-19) symptoms. The World Health Organization recommends you stay at home if you feel sick, even if it’s just a slight runny nose. If you have a fever, cough, or difficulty breathing, it’s time to seek medical treatment. Call ahead to your local primary care provider, urgent care, or emergency room to make sure you’re directed to the proper health care facility. This not only saves you time, it also helps prevent the possible spread of COVID-19. Establish a healthy sleep routine Sleep plays a critical role in both your mental and physical health.  It’s important for a healthy adult to get at least seven hours. So, what can you do to improve your sleep? Set a sleep schedule if you can. Go to sleep and wake up at the same time each day. Avoid large or heavy meals too close to bedtime. Use your bed for sleep and sex only – no TV, no video games, no reading, and no blue light devices. DEARMAN: A Tool to Set Boundaries You know those boundaries I asked you to set, and the help and resources I wanted you to get? And how you’re already anxious and freaking out? Don’t worry, I’ve got a tool for you to use to make doing those things easier. It’s called DEARMAN. It’s an acronym for a therapy skill used to communicate what you want (or to say no!) in an effective way. Here’s what it stands for: Describe the situation (“President Trump has declared a national emergency and I’m running out of food”) Express your feelings (“I am feeling very agoraphobic today and I’m too anxious to go outside”) Assert (“If I give you money for groceries can you please bring them to me?”) Reinforce (“It would really mean a lot to me”) Mindful (Stay focused on this moment and don’t engage in defensiveness or hostility) Assertive (Be matter of fact about your request and assert yourself) Negotiate (After you finish your DEARMAN, the other person may have their own point of view. Hear them out. You may have to negotiate a little and meet halfway.) Self-soothe The concept is to really, really participate and focus on one thing. It can be closing your eyes and focusing on the smell and the steam and the taste of a cup of tea. It’s different for everyone, so give a few a try until you find the one that’s right for you – but it’s important not to use this as an excuse to justify damaging behaviors that harm your mind or body, so be mindful of that, too. Talk to Thrive Counseling! We love to serve our clients by listening deeply, offering incredibly helpful tools and strategies, and walking with you on your journey. We will be offering every client teletherapy sessions via computer, and our HIPAA-compliant software is entirely confidential.

There are many different causes and manifestations of anxiety. This article reviews the causes of anxiety, different anxiety disorders, and how to start treatment.

Sneaky signs of Anxiety We all know what anxiety feels like, or worse, what flat-out panic feels like. But there are other uncommon signs of anxiety that people often overlook.   1. Irritability When someone is highly anxious, it’s like they are walking around with a full cup (full of worries and anxious thoughts). Any little extra poured into their cup, like a small stressor, can cause that cup to overflow and you see a reaction that is usually being very short and irritable. It could be something that is an everyday stressor like a traffic jam or your favorite coffee place being out of espresso. It causes you to be irritable, and look like you are over-reacting, but really the root cause is ongoing chronic anxiety.   2. Hoarding Anxiety can show up in a scarcity mentality-the standpoint that there will never be “enough.” this can lead to hoarding behaviors like having a basement full of canned goods or a year’s worth of paper towels stashed under your bed.   3. Impulsive spending Having chronic anxiety wears away our brain’s ability to make calm and calculated decisions, and so what’s left is our impulses. Impulsive spending is an uncommon sign of anxiety because the anxious mind can’t take a step back and think for a while about a purchase. Instead we just impulse-buy things we probably don’t need and cause further stress.   4. Changing life directions quickly (career, new apartment, switching majors) This is also a sign of impulsivity that’s related to anxiety. If you find yourself making really big life decisions quickly without a lot of forethought that can be a sign of anxiety. Example are deciding to quit your job, switch entire careers, move to a new apartment, switch your college major, or end healthy relationships.    5. Crying (due to overwhelm) Most people associate crying with signs of depression, and that’s true for some people. But anxiety can also lead you to cry due to feeling overwhelmed, rather than sad. If you find yourself feeling so anxious you are crying, you should reach out for help.   6. Indecisiveness An anxious brain is an indecisive brain. Making decisions is taxing on our cognitive energy, and if you have lots of anxiety, your brain is already taxed due to racing thoughts and worries. Therefore, it’s more difficult to make decisions both large and small.    7. Racing Heart Anxiety doesn’t just happen in the brain, it happens in the body too. When you are anxious, your body is getting signals from your brain to be on high alert to danger. You heart may beat faster because your body is trying to get a lot of blood to your limbs, to be ready to fight a threat or run away.    8. Insomnia Anxiety can deeply disrupt sleep and our behaviors around sleep. Your worried thoughts can keep you from falling asleep, or keep you from falling back asleep. Worrying about what happened that day or what might happen the next can make for late nights, sleepy mornings, and too many night wakings.   9. Shakiness For people with very high anxiety, their nervous systems get stuck in emergency mode, and one of the signs of this is shakiness. People may notice shaky hands, or a general overall feeling of shakiness in their bodies.    10. Dizziness Along with shakiness, dizziness can be a sign of extreme or long-term untreated anxiety. The dizziness comes from an overwhelmed nervous system that can’t calm itself down. It’s a worrying symptom but usually harmless and clears up once anxiety gets under control with treatment.   11. Disorganization When in a state of anxiety, our brains struggle with long-term planning and organization. It’s hard for our brains to put tasks in order, or clump them into an order of operations. What results is general disorganization. If you’re anxious, it may show up in missed meetings, running late, a messy home, forgetting to pay bills, and the like.   12. Weight Loss Anxiety leads to a state of high alert in the body, which naturally suppresses appetite. With a low appetite, people usually lose weight and are undernourished. It’s a double-whammy because in order to calm down your whole system you need good, nutritious food and regular meals, so that your blood sugar doesn’t drop and increase your anxiety.

There’s a lot of worrying about Millennials in the media. People worry about Millennials’ job prospects, their student debt, and on and on. Maybe there’s some mirroring going on here, because it turns out that the mental health issue that is hitting Millennials the hardest is Anxiety. Compared to older and younger generations, Millennials have the highest rates of Anxiety Disorders. According to the American Psychological Association, 12% of Millennials (aged 18-34) have been diagnosed at some point with an official Anxiety Disorder. That’s almost twice the rate of Baby Boomers. Other studies have found that 30 percent of working millennials are classified with general anxiety, and a 2014 American College Health Association (ACHA) assessment found that 61 percent of college students experience frequent anxiety. With such staggering numbers, millennials undoubtedly experience a great deal of stress, and subsequently, difficulty properly managing it. What might be hitting this age group particularly hard that leads to clinical levels of anxiety? Some ideas from Journalists at Huffington Post include: Unprecedented levels of Student Loan Debt A Difficult Job Market Growing up steeped in Social Media Creep of Work Hours so that you feel you always have to be ‘on’ and responsive to work tasks Poor Sleep Habits Worry about the future in the midst of historical high costs for housing and healthcare Aging Parents Here at Thrive Counseling in Denver, we hear about anxiety all the time. Some recent quotes from our Millennial clients about their anxiety are: “I feel like I can never get ahead at work. I feel like I’m always treated like ‘the kid’ and some older workers that could retire aren’t, so there’s no where to move up my company’s ladder” “It’s so hard to find a partner. I want to date but dating apps make me feel so inadequate and there’s constant rejection and just shallow conversation. I don’t really know how else to meet people.” “I’m trying to get my footing in the world, but my parents are having some health problems and need lots of help. I feel pressured to move back home to be close to them, but that’s not where I really want to be.” So, how do Millennials tend to manage stress and anxiety? They Talk Openly About It Compared to older generations, Millennials (and younger) tend to not carry a big stigma around mental health issues, including anxiety. As a result, they are much more likely to open up about their own stresses and anxieties with friend, family, and even online communities. It’s relatively easy for this age group to find peers or role models that talk about these issues without shame or embarrassment, and that’s a great trend for everyone’s mental health. They Seek Professional Help Millennials are much more likely than older generations to seek out professional help for mental health issues. Because of the reduced stigma and easier access to Therapists, Doctors, and Psychiatrists, Millennials know where to turn to for help and can find professionals in their area. Therapy used to be something you could only find in large cities, and usually there were only a handful of Therapists or Psychiatrists that worked outside hospitals and institutions. Not any more. Therapists are in every community and are easy to get in to see. Millennials know when to call in the big guns when it comes to their own well-being. They Focus on Overall Health and Wellness In a really positive trend, Millennials seem to be overall healthier than previous generations. They are focused on wellness in general; in mind, body and spirit. Millennials embrace healthy eating, yoga and exercise, and seek ways to cultivate their spiritual well-being. Unhealthy behaviors like smoking and drinking are at record lows among young people. Millennials are the age group most interested in fresh and healthy foods. All of this adds up to a lifestyle that combats stress and anxiety. Often in counseling and therapy we touch on lifestyle changes like these to improve mental health in general, and specifically target anxiety.