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Do You Have a Case of “Hangxiety?” Here’s What You Need to Know About Anxiety and Drinking

Amelia Elkins, LCSW, CAS With alcohol being a depressant, it’s no wonder why those with anxiety turn to drinking in times of need. In the moment, alcohol may feel like a numbing agent, a way to relax, or even a way to feel more comfortable connecting socially. Alcohol is also very normalized in the United States.   It’s legal, and is available pretty much anywhere, making it an easy option to reduce stress. That being said, “Hangxiety” is becoming a new buzz word and folks with underlying anxiety are noticing how detrimental hangovers can be for their mental health. Hangxiety is the high level of unease, nervousness, or stress one may feel on top of the usual side effects of a hangover. If you use alcohol to cover up anxiety in the moment, the anxiety doesn’t disappear but rather lays dormant until there’s no substance to cover it up, hence the strong sense of anxiety the following day. There is also research to suggest that the dopamine hormone is lower after a night of drinking.  A lack of dopamine definitely doesn’t help when you’re trying to maintain a decent baseline mood. Rather than turning to alcohol and risking the chance of only increasing your symptoms, instead try these tools to reduce anxiety: >Daily Exercise >Healthy, Balanced Diet low in sugar and caffeine >Daily Meditation >Recognizing anxiety triggers through journaling >Checking the Facts >Medication and/or Therapy Lastly, if you’re noticing drinking becoming a regular tool to reduce anxiety, it may be time to seek out professional support. Individual therapy is a great way to reduce drinking while also working on reducing anxiety. Reach out today to get started.

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Are You or Someone You Know Struggling with Thoughts of Suicide? Here are Some Resources That You Should Know About.

Amelia Elkins, LCSW, CAS While it is completely normal to have thoughts of hopelessness from time to time, suicidal thoughts should be taken seriously and deserve attention. Today, suicide is still more prevalent among males, however, females are more likely to attempt suicide. For folks under the age of 24 years old, suicide is the third leading cause of death, and second leading cause for the specific age group of 10-14 years old. American Indian and Alaska Native individuals are at the greatest risk for suicide, with non-Hispanic white folks coming in as the second most at risk group. There are so many pressures for today’s younger generations including appearance, grades, friendships, social media, and constant screen time. Constant comparison and accessibility leads to extra stress for teenagers, which could lead to suicidal ideation if one is already not feeling mentally stable. If you or someone you know seems to be struggling, connect with them and don’t ignore the signs. Here is a list of resources for support: Colorado: Colorado Crisis Services is a 24/7 hotline for support. They also offer walk in centers around Denver to be seen day of: https://coloradocrisisservices.org. Pikes Peak Suicide Prevention in Colorado Springs offers individual therapy, group therapy and other resources: https://www.pikespeaksuicideprevention.org. Denver Indian Family Resource Center offers support for American Indian and Alaska Native Families: https://difrc.org. The Asian Pacific Development Center offers a wide range of mental health services for Asian American Pacific Islanders: https://www.apdc.org/about-us. El Centro de las Familias is a multicultural clinic providing mental health services in both Spanish and English: https://www.wellpower.org/el-centro-de-las-familias-english/. National: 988 Suicide Line offers resources and a hotline: https://988lifeline.org Crisis Text Line offers a 24/7 text hotline: https://www.crisistextline.org The Trevor Project offers a variety of resources for LGBTQ folks: https://www.thetrevorproject.org Starting therapy and having regular support may be beneficial in reducing suicidal ideation. Reach out today to get support.

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Reflections and Intentions for the New Year

Amelia Elkins, LCSW, CAS Sick of all the pressure of new year, new me? Focusing on reflections from the past year and intentions for the next twelve months may be a more helpful option. I recommend starting a journal to get these prompts going and to look back for accountability as you head into 2023. Reviewing and checking your journal each year can be a great way to recognize growth, challenges, and set the stage for next year’s intentions. Utilize these prompts below to explore both: Reflections from the Previous Year: >What about this past year am I proud of? >What are the top three highlights from this year? >What is one challenge I overcame this past year? >What characteristics helped me overcome this challenge? >How did I change this past year? Intentions for 2023: >If 2023 were to go really well for me, what would this look like? >What do I want my 2023 mantra to be? Examples may include: “I create my own path and am joyful” “My positive thoughts take me to new heights” “I am conquering my fears and become stronger each day” >What am I giving up in 2023? (Toxic friendships, an unhealthy relationship with food, etc.) >What am I inviting into 2023? (Success, contentment, healthy relationships, etc.) Reflection and intention are so important for a healthy relationship with oneself. If this feels daunting to explore alone then turning toward this work with a therapist may be helpful. Reach out today to get started!  

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Worried about Seasonal Affective Disorder? Embrace Winter with These Four Tools

Amelia Elkins, LCSW, CAS Winter is coming! ‘Tis the season for colder temperatures, post-holiday blues, and gray skies. For some, this may mean stress or anxiety about the potential onset of SAD (seasonal affective disorder). The seasons simply changing may start to trigger symptoms of depression, such as: low energy, exhaustion, and lack of motivation. Risk factors for developing SAD include living in an area with less daylight during the winter, having a Bipolar diagnosis, or a family history of SAD. If you’re concerned about developing SAD, are in a current phase of SAD, or know someone struggling, check out these tools for support: >Let there be light: Purchasing a light box and sitting in front of one for a set amount of time each day has been proven to be an effective treatment. Also, making daylight a daily priority by going for a walk may be helpful. If traveling is an option, making a point of traveling somewhere sunny and warm in the middle of winter is also a great tool for mixing up a challenging season. >Self-Care Routine: Making healthy eating, daily exercise, consistent sleep patterns, and water intake a priority cannot be underestimated. Self-care may also include getting rid of negative influences, taking space from people who aren’t making you feel like your best self, and focusing on activities that create joy. >Consult your Doctor: Having a doctor check in on your Vitamin D intake, run a physical, and check your thyroid may also be helpful in addressing and reducing symptoms. >Reset your Space: If you must be inside due to the weather, how do you feel about your space? Taking time to clean, organize, and get rid of items which aren’t contributing to feelings of wellbeing may be helpful. The Dutch art of Hygge can be practiced year round, but may be especially helpful during the winter months. This includes creating lots of indoor light, comforting music, comforting food, and yummy smells.

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Three Denver Date Night Ideas to Reignite Connection

Amelia Elkins, LCSW, CAS “Date night is important, even if it’s going to Schlotzsky’s” -Brad Paisley Date Night is Important Whether six months into a relationship or married for 20 years, making designated time for connection with your partner is crucial to relationship success. Emotional connection is often credited as being the number one factor in keeping relationships strong (more on this here.) In today’s world there are numerous distractions like screens, pets, children, work, and obligations.  These all make is extremely challenging to find uninterrupted time.  One of the best things I recommend for my clients is to set aside time once every two weeks to once a month for concrete connection. This may be as simple as one hour over coffee before going to work, or more complex, such as a night away. Regardless of budget, date night can be achieved. Here are some creative ideas in the Denver area to spice things up:   Free Art Walks: Denver is home to several great art neighborhoods; Santa Fe Art District and RiNo Art District. Both offer free art walks and there are often food trucks galore if you’re hungry. Take time to discuss what pieces you like, versus which you don’t and why. Make a rule to have phones silenced as best you can to be present. More on these here: https://denversartdistrict.org/first-friday/ https://rinoartdistrict.org/visit/first-fridays   Cooking Class: The couple that cooks together, stays together? Another great way to be present on a date night is to do something hands on. And what better way than to learn new skills in the kitchen! Here are some great options for local classes: https://denvercookingclasses.com https://cookstreet.com/product-category/one-night-classes/ https://www.cozymeal.com/denver/cooking-classes https://www.stirtolearn.com/new-page-2   Indoor Rock Climbing: This is another great option to ensure presence on a date, while also moving your body and trying something new. Several locations offer a free tour and an option to “show you the ropes” for your first climb. What a great way to support each other trying something new! Here are options around Denver: https://movementgyms.com/first-visit/ https://denverboulderingclub.com/first-visit/ https://ugclimbing.com/denver/

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Is Imposter Syndrome Holding You Back? Start Building Confidence Today with These Tools

Amelia Elkins, LCSW, CAS   “Nothing Can Dim the Light that Shines from Within” -Maya Angelou What is Imposter Syndrome?  Imposter syndrome is defined as feeling like a fraud, phony, and believing that you’re actually not as competent as others believe you to be.  Do you find that you struggle to see your accomplishments? Do you work extra hard, so others don’t “suspect” anything about your work?  Do you ever credit to your success to outside factors, rather than your own abilities? If any of these apply to you, then you might be experiencing imposter syndrome.  This is obviously a challenging cycle to be in and can result in burnout, depression, and an inability to ever feel accomplished or proud of oneself. Here are some things that you can try and begin breaking this cycle and reaching your full potential today.   Recognize how your childhood played a role and break the cycle. When you were growing up, was there a lot of pressure to perform, be the best, or constantly do better? This could be impacting you today. Identifying how these messages played a positive or negative role on your view of yourself is important. What would it mean to break these cycles today? Determine what you want your life to look like, rather than what you have been told it should look like, and work toward this instead. More on this   Get feedback from Coworkers or Colleagues. One of the biggest challenges of imposter syndrome is believing you’re worthy. Asking for positive feedback from colleagues, supervisors, and even friends is a great way to gather proof that the negative thoughts in your head are simply thoughts. Keeping a log or folder full of these truths can be super helpful in dark moments. Simply pull out the log and remind yourself how others see you.   Work toward Self-Acceptance and Compassion. Perfectionism and imposter syndrome go hand in hand so finding ways to challenge negative trains of thought is crucial. If the belief is “I don’t deserve to be giving this presentation,” rewire this belief with three new thoughts. Here are some examples: “I was asked to do the presentation, so someone believes my intellect.” Or “I can trust that I’m doing the best I can, and I will prepare so I’ll feel confident in myself.” More on this here.   Looking for more support? Reach out today to get individualized support for Imposter Syndrome.

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Are You Being Love Bombed? Here’s What You Need to Know.

Amelia Elkins, LCSW, CAS What is Love Bombing?  At this point, the terms “gaslighting” and “ghosting” are commonly used in today’s dating language lingo. But what about love bombing? According to Sabrina Romanoff, PsyD, love bombing is when someone “bombs” you with extreme displays of attention and affection. In the beginning of a relationship, the difference between infatuation and love bombing could be confusing. Here are three common themes to help you recognize whether you are being love bombed in a relationship. 1.) Feeling Smothered A love bomber will go to great lengths to spend as much time as possible with their partner. This may look like inviting themselves to outings, overstaying a welcome, and/or putting their needs before their partner’s. Obviously, in the beginning of a relationship this can be confusing to differentiate. There is a difference between wanting to spend lots of time together versus recognizing space is healthy.  Time away from our partner helps develop stronger relationships in the long run. If a partner came over every Friday night and is just leaving Monday morning, in the beginning of dating, this could be an example of love bombing. More on this here. 2.)  Big Gestures Another component of love bombing includes large gestures like flowers, trips, dinners, and gifts. Sounds great right? This is how most get sucked into a love bombing relationship. Important factors to notice are a sense of deep connection that is almost forced, such as intense eye connection, talks about the future and committing to plans, and excessive flattery. Or maybe the love bomber is saying ‘I love you’ when you aren’t ready. Again, some of this is normal in the beginning of a relationship and should be happening, but it’s the extent and level of intensity to watch out for. More on this here. 3.)  Control Lastly, with a love bomber, things will inevitably begin to shift and lead to a sense of dominance. Constant texting, calling, or checking in may become the norm and before you know it, you are in an abusive situation. This is where gaslighting may start to show up and things become super confusing. This phase may also result in the love bomber trying to separate you from friends and family to create sole reliance on them. This may look like the love bomber becoming upset if you spend time with friends or family instead of them. More on this here. How to Know the Difference Lastly, components of healthy infatuation include a honeymoon phase where of course one desires to be with their partner and feels amazing around them. The difference is, there is space, separation, and healthy boundaries around wants and needs. Fantasizing about the future is normal but committing to things a year out after only a few weeks or months of dating is a little too intense.  Interested in exploring more about love bombing? Therapy is a great way to process the healthy vs. challenging components of a relationship. Reach out today to get started.

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