Covid-19 is the single largest collective crisis that most people have experienced.
Covid19 is affecting almost everyone’s mental health. Going through a personal crisis is a very normal event. Usually, these are times of upheaval in a person’s life. The most common events are: starting your first job, moving to a new place, getting divorced, becoming a parent, becoming seriously ill, or losing a loved one. During these times, our mental health can take a beating as we try to cope with a massive upheaval and move forward into a new normal.
But these are personal events. Coronavirus is a global issue. Never before have we all been in a time of great upheaval together. Think about the large events and consequences that we’re all dealing with. Do any of these apply to you?
- –More than 40% of Americans say that Covid-19 has changed their lives in “a major way.”
- -More than 30% of Americans with young children say that Covid-19 has been “very difficult”
- –About 30% of Americans have lost their jobs; many more have lost income.
- The majority of Americans know someone who has been sick due to Covid-19 or died from it.
How is our mental health doing during this coronavirus pandemic? The short answer is: not very good.
In short, if an evil scientist were to come up with a situation that would severely stress our mental health, it would look a lot like the times we’re living through right now:
- Lots of uncertainty
- Social Isolation
- Frequent changes in social norms
- Strained relationships
- Grief and Loss
- Monotony
- Constant decision-making around our own physical safety
- Having to make safety-related decisions for others (loved ones and children)
- Loss of control and a sense of agency in your own life
- Disruption of hobbies and routines
Sound familiar?
Hear me now: this situation we all find ourselves in is the perfect storm for stress, anxiety, depression, and substance abuse.
No one would be unaffected. It’s okay that you’re struggling right now. It’s normal to feel out of balance during extremely abnormal times. You are not alone. Nearly half of Americans polled report that Covid19 is harming their mental health, and federal emergency phone hotline reported a staggering 1,000 percent increase in April compared to the same time last year.
So What Do We Do From Here?
When you go to school for therapy, the first thing you learn is a sort of mental health First Aid protocol. It’s an incredibly helpful tool kit, and it’s easy to forget about the basics when there’s a crisis. We are getting many calls to Thrive Counseling, and most of the people I talk to need to start with First Aid before diving into deeper issues, or working on anything new. There’s nothing wrong with this. Having a strong foundation sets us all up for success. Here’s what I recommend.
First, Assess your Mental Health
The first step here is to do an honest assessment of your mental health at this moment. Try not to think about how you might normally feel; how do you feel right now? How are you honestly doing? Ask yourself these questions:
- Am I worrying most of the day?
- Do I feel panicky or unable to calm down?
- Do I feel depressed every day?
- Do I feel numb?
- Do I feel worthless?
- Do I feel out of control?
- Do I have strange or scary thoughts?
- Do I seem to cry all the time?
- Can I make decisions?
- Can I keep up with daily tasks like working, child care, making and eating meals, showering?
- Can I relate to other people?
- Do I feel like I am completely alone?
- Can I sleep in a normal way?
- Am I relying on drugs and alcohol to cope?
There are also some self-assessments (like a quiz) you can take to get a good picture of your mental health at Mental Health America.
Second, Cultivate the Right Frame of Mind
Once you have a picture of your own mental health, it’s really important to put this information into context. It’s really easy to get into a self-blaming cycle here. But you need to remember that these are not normal times. Everything you are feeling is okay, and you can cope with it. There are people to help. Being honest with yourself is not the same as blaming yourself or seeing yourself as weak, sick, or different from others in some way.
Most people don’t realize that at some point in their lives almost every human feels anxious, depressed, unstable, or abuses substances. Most people at one point or another would qualify for a mental health diagnosis because these issues reach a clinical level. Only a small number of people feel clinically anxious, depressed, unstable or dependent on substances for a long period of time. Most people have these challenging times, cope well with support, and return to feeling like themselves. Most likely, if your mental health is suffering right now, it is temporary. It is also understandable (and even normal and healthy) to feel these things in response to a global and personal crisis.
I’ve been talking with my clients about how Covid-19 is impacting their mental health, and I’ve noticed something interesting; even if a client admits that their daily life is tolerable and they are coping relatively well, these is a background of stress or simply living through a pandemic. The constant news headlines, the daily stress of making decisions about social contact, the emotional work on keeping relationships impact. These things are real and have a real effect on our bodies and minds.
Third, Work on Stabilization
Once you have a handle on where you’re at, the next thing to work on in basic stabilization. Good mental health flows from good daily habits. The biggest impact on our mental stability stems from three things: Sleep, Nutrition, and Movement (or exercise). By focusing on these three basic things, you can bring yourself back to a more stable mental place.
It’s important to remember here you don’t have to be perfect. Not even close. This isn’t the time to push yourself to run a marathon or adopt Whole 30. I’m talking about very reasonable measures, with lots of grace given to ourselves and flexibility:
- Sleep: set an alarm or a reasonable time, get in bed when you’re sleepy, try to have a 30 minute “wind down” period before bed with no screens. Aim for around 8 hours, but no need to be rigid here.
- Nutrition: Aim to eat 3 meals a day. Eat mostly healthy food. Drink water. Have some treats. When we’re under stress, we usually overeat or undereat. Aim for balanced and regular meals to feed your body and brain.
- Movement: Move your body every day. In whatever way feels good. Aim for 30 minutes if you can. Do something your enjoy.
These simple (but difficult!) steps are the most “bang for your buck” when trying to feel more like yourself. Your brain is like a toddler; it really loves its routines. When our basic routines and bodily needs get ou of whack, we are more susceptible to anxiety, depression, indecision, and turning to drugs and alcohol to regulate ourselves.
Fourth, Work on Processing and Try New Things
After you’re feeling more stable, the next step is to work on processing your thoughts and feeling and trying out new things. Processing can take many forms; talking to a therapist, journaling, reading about other’s experiences, talking to loved ones, joining a support group, making art or music, etc. Everyone processes differently. Choose a form that feels good for you.
Trying new things can also take different forms. In therapy, this usually starts with leaning new coping tools. For example, learning mindfulness skills or increasing insight into our own thoughts patterns and behaviors. On your own, you could read a self-help book, try a new hobby or activity, or learn coping tools on your own. Whatever you choose, you don’t need to do it alone. You could contact us for a free consultation with a professional. You could reach out to a supportive friend for advice. Remember that learning new ways of thinking, acting, and responding is difficult and can take some time.
Above All Remember: These are Unprecedented Times, Be Kind to Yourself
If there is one thing I keep repeating to myself, my loved ones, my kids, and my clients it’s this: be kind to yourself. We’re all in a very stressful and brand new set of circumstances. We need to be kind to ourselves, have realistic expectations for ourselves and show up for ourselves. We need some extra support, stability, and grace for ourselves.